Hard of Understanding

And just for once it isn't the human anagram, Lembit Opik.

It would appear that Lib MP, Norman Lamb has become a guru in the area of Grime, a breakout form of Hip Hop, to the extent that he has invested 10k in his son's record label and spent a lot of time discussing tracks. See here

Reading his CV, he appears to be one of the least likely contenders for Grime promoter, but is this a positive or negative thing?

I mean, we often hear about lads's mags, papers and gossip columns banging on about MPs preference in: music, film, sex(!) etc etc. and we've heard some of he best.

Take the poll of favourite film, I remember how a few Labour MPs chose "Brassed Off." Admittedly a good film, though I would say so as I play brass instruments, but you're left with that nagging feeling that it isn't actually their favourite film , they chose it simply because it has a strong socialist message. I have a political preference (I'm not telling you what it is) but I'd never choose a filme simply because of that.

I mean, if you want to choose a film for a political message, how about Doctor Strangelove? A masterpiece with a devastating moral at the end! I bet no pro-nuclear MP would have chosen that, although many will love it!

But in the case of Mr Lamb, he does apear to have taken a genuine interest. So, gimmic or good?

In my humble (and egotistical opinion) GOOD! This is an example of someone who is actually in touch with a culture that many simply can't get anywhere near.

This bit will sound patronising, but hey ho. A huge part of music culture is to speak out, get your message across etc etc. It is the equivalent of someone writing a newspaper column or even a blog.

As the second most ignored part of society by our elected representatives after the working class, to have a parliamentarian who has not only invested hard cash into this industry, but appears to understand it as well, could this be the start of a bigger revolution where youth culture may be (even if just a little bit) understood and embraced, rather than feared and reviled?

Well, the thought would be nice but I'll not be holding my breath.

Perhaps a few of Mr Lamb's peers would like to take note, though?

You know me, anything that gets my hackles up tends to make it here.

So, Jacqui Smith, our low cut Home Secretary has announced on a visit to our fair city (well, as fair as it can be) that we might be in the running for a trial of ID cards.

Is this as punishment for advising our elected representatives where to go over the ill-fated TIF Fund referendum?

As someone who is big on personal privacy and civil liberties (admittedly not so hot in practice, damn my reliance on the internet!) I'm already spitting fire that when my passport expires in July I get the opportunity to donate bio-metric data to a government that I can count on to then share with the general public (not on purpose simply down to their sheer incompetence.)

And my thoughts on the ID card are of a similar vane. Data will be managed by a private company, so safe and secure then!!!!!!

Ms Smith's plans for it are also so utterly devoid of ethics I almost have a renewed respect for her balls in in the matter. How she intends to get it off the ground is by encouraging teenagers to sign up for them.

I spend a lot of time on the internet, and where I'm from that's called grooming!

And as an aside, I remember being a teenager. You struggle with your identity as you try to conform, rebel, hide and disguise yourself. It's all part of your transition from child to adult and learning about who you are.

And our government wish to take this step of our natural development away by giving us all a number and file.

I need to get 1984 back off the bookshelf, I'm sure there was something in there about this.

It's been a funny old day.

Here I tend to focus quite heavily on the inept actions of others (and at times myself) as, well, the blog is almost a therapy as well as an egotisical opportunity to try and get an audience (I've always been a bit of an exhibitionist.)

Some people have been lampooned by me, some have been paid compliments.

With my local council, however I'm not sure what to think. Have a read through of this story and tell me what you think So, they seem to be focusing on local businesses for contracts for work that needs doing. This surely is good?

But there is that niggling feeling that something about this news article simply doesn't add up.

Don't worry, it'll come to me.

Well, not so much blinging up as much as buying a new one.

Oh yes, in these desperate times, there is still someone gratuitously purchasing expensive, shiny consumer goods. And this time in the form of a Nikon DSLR.

It's great, does all sorts of cool things, 10mp, quick good lens quality.

I just wish I knew how to use it.

I had a funny feeling that I was going to get some form of abuse for being anti-congestion charge, and sure enough I've finally got a message berating me for voting "NO."

The abuse came from someone who lives in Rossendale (part of Lancashire) who commutes to Manchester to work.

"This charge would have led to improvements to make my commute to work easier."

No it wouldn't. The plans would have reduced capacity to 100% at 2008's levels. As people moved across to public transport, within 1 year it would be straining under it's own weight again and many would be forced back onto the road, and forced to pay the tax. It was ill conceived, poorly thought out and would have been a diabolical system for our roads.

If the plans had any merit then the outcome could have been different.

"I should have had a vote!"

Why should you? Why should you have the opportunity to meddle in something that has the biggest impact on the residents of Manchester. Suggesting that you have a vote would be like the residents of Stockport deciding how town centre Accrington should look.

The congestion charge part of the TIF (which many were only thinking of when they sent back the forms) directly affected 9 of the 10 Greater Manchester boroughs. To suggest that someone who only visits for work, leisure etc such have as equal a say as the person who actually lives there is simply ludicrous.

I appreciate that the TIF funds may have improved the service from your part of the region into the City Centre, but the negative effects that it would have created in my town, my borough and my county far outweigh the very limited merits that this scheme had. It would literally divided communities and added an unnecessary burden to the residents of Greater Manchester.

So, you'll excuse me if I don't share your views on the TIF plans or referendum, but it was a Manchester issue that Manchester residents voted on.

No, I've not lost my mind. I'm not convinced about the Treasury's, though.

It has been reported that sales of beer (in particular ale) are falling at their fastest rates ever! The industry, like all others, has a group of lobbyists to protect its interests. These good folk are beside themselves with angst.

They are virtually begging the government to take back the 18% rise in duty imposed last year, which has simply added to the woes of an industry that has been suffering under the weight of: Smoking ban (I'm not getting into that here), Utility Costs, Economic Downturn and duty increase after duty increase over many years.

So, 6 pubs a day are closing now, and we are becoming a country of Weatherspoons'. People weren't happy with the thought of big retail chains taking the life out of town centres, but we are complicit with blandness in our watering holes? Right.

The treasury, in their eternal wisdom have offered their reasoning for why there was a 18% rise in duty last year and why it won't be going back on it. And it is.......... child poverty.

Yup, Child Poverty. The drinkers of this nation have come together and now pay an extra 18% for their pint in order to help fight child poverty. I must have missed that referendum.

I'm not saying that fighting child poverty is a bad thing, I think that it is fantastic. I just fail to see the correlation between the drinks industry and child poverty (except in fairly extreme circumstances)

But, judging by the results, this is a plan with flaws. People are now turning to a cheap can of beer in front of EmmerEast Street. Supermarkets (big chains with little to no impact on a local economy) are now raking in the effects of their cheap booze, and your local is losing out. Don't forget that these are people's livelihoods as well, so it isn't just a building with shutters up, it is someone's business in ruins.

When I went ape about the amount I pay to H.M. to keep my car on the road and quizzed why all these taxes were being collected, yet transport in this country is third world, a gobby government bod was quick to point out that our taxes didn't work like that.

Looks like they do now.

I want that pothole outside my front door fixing, tomorrow! 

Well, maybe not quite but a start, I suppose. See story here

OFCOM has got into a habit recently of fining television stations, in particular those of the terrestrial variety for numerous breaches of code, and today it has finally got round to getting ITV for being too London centric, something which I already had a pop about last May.

So, they got their wrists slapped and had to hand over what surely was going to be a bonus for someone.

What gets me about this is the manner in which ITV have acted about this. They aren't happy as they thought that they had met their target until an internal audit pointed out otherwise.

Well, that just serves them bloody right for aiming squarely at minimum standards!

I'm a little curious as to what OFCOM are planning to do with their recently acquired fortune, although I'm sure they successfully avoid making any noise about it whatsoever.

In the meantime, the future of ITV in its current form. Lumbering, failing, inadequate.

Time for another franchise round?

I should stoppit really, but it does fulfill a masochistic niche.

So, I'm sat in the pub having a quiet drink (I'd just been kicked out of the house for a few hours for being unbearable - unbearable....... moi?) so decided to sulk on my own over a pint or 4.

Sat across from me was a family moaning like bloody hell about about some medication that the matriarch had been pre-scribed as it didn't taste too nice,

"Cheesecake he said it would taste like, cheesecake!! I don't know where he got that idea from, but it tasted NOTHING like cheesecake!"

I could only hazard a guess from what she was fuming, that the medication (which I never bothered to inquire about, mostly as that would make me appear to be just a little odd) wasn't quite as nice as she wished for.

What stuck with me was the, "I don't know where he got that idea from" that was repeated almost obsessively as though the GP was incompetent.

Did she think that the GP had tried the medication himself? If so, surely the issue of him trying all the different drugs as though a pharmaceutical pick 'n' mix would raise a whole different series of questions about the GP's competency?

So, one of the junior family tried to venture a suggestion,

"Why don't you tell him this when you next see him?"

And?

"Oh, don't be so bloody stupid, you don't tell a doctor things like that!"

And there's the answer to why the doctor still thinks that this particular medication doesn't in fact taste of the dessert to which he had been led to believe.

Brilliant.

OK, so I'm wading into politics here (and public transport) but there are people who seem to have this inherent knack of pissing me off very quickly. Ok so my temper tends to be 0-psychotic in 3 seconds, but that is entirely beside the point.

And this time, the sitting duck is one of the heads of the GMPTE (Greater Manchester Passenger Transport Executive.)

Many will have noticed that the people of Manchester weren't too keen on the prospect of being charged to drive round our own city (after VED, fuel duty, insurance tax, maintenance costs, vat etc etc etc ad infinitum.) In fact the result of the ballot was as close to a "FUCK OFF" as you could ask for.

The local authorities wanted £2.75bn to spend on public transport which Manchester is in desperate need of. In return for this loan (yes, loan!) from central government, they thought that the people of manchester could pay twice for it (once in our general taxes, where do you think the loan was coming from and again in the charge.... brilliant!!!!!)

Anyway, this is beside the point.

The leader of the GMPTE has now had the nerve to be mouthing off in the Manchester Evening News about how well the plans for the Metrolink is doing and how bright and shiny the new trams will be when they are delivered.

Oh good, looking at the bigger picture eh?

OK, let me tell you something. The metrolink (owned by the GMPTE, profiteered operated by Stagecoach) runs one line, a branch line and a stump. It does not encompass Greater Manchester at all, it caters for; City of Manchester, Bury, Trafford and bits of Salford. But they are putting all their eggs in the basket which they own!!!!!!!!!!!

MerseyTravel have invested over £1m in staffing all its stations, WYPTE have bought new commuter trains to ease chronic overcrowding.

And Manchester? doesn't give a fuck to anyone who doesn't live along its owned infrastructure.

So, people of Manchester, move to near a tram stop otherwise soon you will have to drive everywhere!!!!!!

No rant, I seriously want to know!!!!

Answers on a post-card, kids.